Ghosty22's movie Reviews on Newgrounds

[Metroid Sex Education]

This might've been cooler...

When you drew the text with your hand... That sucked. It made it look very sloppy. I think that if you just used the text tool to type the text in, it would improve this short, maybe like 67.34593%. Oh... Wait... Not 67.34593%, I actually meant to say 67.34693%.

Oh yeah... And add more jokes. These jokes weren't really funny. But don't get me wrong!!! They were smirky, which is one level below funny. It's not bad, but funniness is better.

IceKeyHunter responds:

They were SUPPOSED to look sloppy.

[Trash]

???????

This was... Kind of stupid.

So the point of this was to perform experiments on a guy in a trash can? Why?

And let me get this straight... Some engineer takes the time to build this enormous contraption built for spinning things around through the air. He designs all of the mechanical aspects of it, but for some reason, the concept of a "release lever" escaped him.... And as a result, he built this complex mechanism from which a rabid squirrel could be released, so it could chew the ropes... That that is quite a dumb feat of engineering. Quite a gamble too...

Some of the three dimensional-looking animation was really well done... Just about everything else was stupid beyond belief.

[Taishi Ep 1: Enter Lotus]

Sort of Cool...

I like the fact that you actually took the time to write a script. Most people are too lazy for that.

The layout of the credits was really strange. You put them right in the middle of the thing. I thought it had ended, but then it kept on going.

Your human characters were shaped a bit funny. Sometimes their heads were too big... Sometimes their limbs seems too short and stumpy. Remember, your shoulders are broad enough to hold three heads on top of them. That is, each shoulder should be just long enough to fit a second head on it. And from your toes to the top of your skull should be seven heads tall.

You're pretty good with lighting effects, but in the beginning, it just seems as if you put more attention toward the lights and not the characters. The lights looked very real, and it was kind of a let down when the people weren't.

Anyway... Keep these mofos comin'

[Burnt Face Man 4]

Not really that funny...

Actually... Some parts were pretty funny... Like Haddock Boy's discovery of the chicken-flavored cereal bar.

The Introduction of Slighty-bruised Man was funny, but just about everything he said wasn't. The asian admirer's lines kind of made me smirk. But laughs are better.

Burnt Face Man episodes seem to be getting weaker.

Some of the lines you use are pretty common lines you'd hear any schmo off the street saying. I just think super heroes should have more colorful lines. "My penis is bigger than his, and I get all the chicks," just doesn't seem humiliating enough for it to be funny.

Seems like the line at the end, should be a hard-hitting punch line... A guy getting all the chicks is pretty common. Maybe if he said something like "My penis is bigger than his, and his lair is decorated with naked pictures of James Van Derbeak..." That's more humiliating than "I get more chicks than he does... Because that super hero probably gets more chicks than a lot of people. Less "manly men" would dreamily gaze at teen idols...

Also, I think Burnt face man's anger sort of kills the funny. Humiliation is more funny than anger, because you can be angry and still keep your dignity. I don't know how much help you're looking for from this site... But I hope I at least said something helpful to you...

[Tom Cruise Gets Wet!]

What's so funny about that?

Seriously... What's do funny about this stupid animation? It wasn't funny the first time it happened. And now, even with the help of comedic situations (arguably) it still isn't funny.

What is the message behind this? Are you attacking Tom Cruise because he was upset that someone splashed him with water? I don't know what the point is... All I know is... It didn't even come close to making me laugh... Wasn't clever or interesting.

[Star Wars: Rebel Alliance]

What was this doing on the front page?

Man.. I hate to trash stuff, and maybe if it wasn't on the front page, I wouldn't be so hard on it, but damn...

What the hell was this?

The the characters had egg heads... The backgrounds didn't have very much detail at all. I'm not even sure how to begin describing how bad this was.

I guess it was meant to emulate Starwars... Yet Starwars is, at least, interesting to watch. This isn't. This really doesn't do Starwars any justice at all. You could at least make up for the lack of visual effects by writing some kind of script and, I don't know, perhaps insert an interesting story or characters.

But it's not only bad because the artwork isn't any good... It's bad because the stories, acting, and scripts in the movies were already bad enough when George Lucas was in charge. This didn't even have any of those, which amplifies its suckiness. It was just one big fight scene... A poorly done fight scene.

But the guy who did it was only 16, according to his profile... I guess this is good for a 16-year-old... But the question stills stands. Why is this on the front page?

[Through Thick and Thin]

Was that Craig --the evil toilet?

This was kinda funny... And kind of nasty at the same time. It almost made me puke. But I was laughing too. It was a strange experience.

But the toilet reminded me a lot of "The Mighty Craig..." You know, the eivl toilet. Arch enemy of Burnt Face Man. He even burps projectile feces on people, just like in this.

[Berserk]

What was this supposed to be?

So... Does this guy do anything other than stand on a windy cliffside, pose with his shirt off, and look at flowers? Who is he and what the hell is point of this? Why is it that anime characters are always standing around, staring vacantly, on windy days? Seems like half the time that's all they do. Yeah, maybe the character looks kind of cool, (not in this particular case) but I, at least, think there should be something more... Like dialog... Or a story...

What's his story? What's his conflict? There really wasn't anything intersting about this...

[Sweet Beez]

What?!?!

The first sweet bee thing wasn't all that great...

But BABY SQUIRREL ORGIES HAVE GOT TO STOP!!! Those baby squirrels don't know what their doing! Their young baby squirrel brains will be forever corrupted by your insidious baby squirrel orgies! Damn you!! Damn you to hell!

You know why there are so many dead squirrels in the street? Suicide! They can't handle the quirrel orgy scars that you've inflicted upon them!

[Rikimaru Goes Shopping]

This was funny...

This was really funny... To me... Yeah. The only problem I could see was that the text went by so fast that I couldn't catch all of it...

But I've always believed that costumed characters in every day situations is funny. Cuz you just don't imagine Iron Man going to the store or taking crap! But he's human too! He needs to eat! He has bodily functions just like everyone else!